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Your problem with feminism, simply explained

One of the most debated topics during the last year was “feminism”. I am writing it in quotes since actually there isn’t even an agreement on what this word precisely means, as proven by the numerous holy wars unleashed from every direction based on personal interpretations of the term.

 

In fact, talking about “last year” isn’t entirely correct either, as the debate is decades-old. What recently changed is its tone that, following the trite routine on the social networks, grew ever more shouted, extremized and inflammatory just to snatch a few clicks more.

 

The chaos produced by this ugly drift had a paradoxical effect, at least for me. On the one hand I often felt the urge to contribute to the discourse bringing helpful information and data. On the other I was painfully aware that anything I could say or write would have me lynched by at least one fighting faction, which would surely instrumentalize my thought, possibly distorting it. That’s how this arena works: just like talk shows and the relentless trolling that passes for politics these days.

 

So I stood on the side and kept working on paraphilias and unusual sexualities. Still, incels grew as time went by, and TERFS, and revenge porn, and media activists, and gender-based violence, and the idiocies preached by overnight “experts”, and… And well, keeping silent became harder and harder.
I’ll tell you what: if you think you have an issue with feminism and you care about my opinion, you are going to find it below, as succinctly as I could. If you agree with it, fine. If you don’t, I am also ok with it, but please keep from invoking a fatwa against me: I have no time nor wish for squabbling, and I am sure we both can survive even if we disagree. Either way, I hope to offer some food for thought. Let’s go!

 

  • The biggest hurdle for “feminism” is the obstination to call it so, with a word intrinsically opposed to masculinity that immediately triggers the hostility of those men who feel under attack.
  • Most of what is discussed today under the label of feminism is actually about human rights and everybody’s wellness, no matter what their gender is. Again, if we didn’t call it ‘intersectional feminism’ but simply ‘equality’, much hatred would instantly dissolve.
  • Still on language: English speakers are at least spared the issue of the many colorful attempts of bending existing gendered languages (such as my mother tongue, Italian) to the needs of inclusivity. This is however impossible, making equality activists sound like suspicious weirdos.
  • As if this wasn’t enough, there also is a small number of “feminists” who actually believe that social problems must be solved declaring war against males, transexual persons, queer people and those who don’t generally are like them. Since these maniacal fringes are also the most visible, many people mistakenly identify feminism with their indefensible attitude.
  • The above-listed aspects become fertile ground for the stupidest reactionary criticisms – once again much loved by the media. Just keep in mind that when you see a moron declaring that males are an oppressed category, that there is a women’s conspiracy or other similar fooleries, in 5% of the cases he is a serious psychiatric case; in the remaining 95% he is just a hypocrite trying to become famous, or to sell something.
  • Sure, because a big part of the confusion on the subject is fostered by countless media activists of every gender and belief: visibility-seeking people who pontificate on any trending topic posing as big champion of the cause… although they have no competence at all and they don’t do anything concrete besides jabbering in front of a webcam. That wouldn’t be bad per se, but their noise drowns out the real experts, who would have so many interesting things to say yet become so hard to find out.

 

This is really it: in the vast majority of cases, “feminism” problems just derive from its misrepresentation, not from its content. After all, how could you oppose the idea of all people having the same right to realize themselves, to be correctly paid for their work, not to have to fear for their safety, to live with their loved ones, to decide for their own health, to have a political representation, and so on? Like it or not, one of the words to refer to this aspiration also is ‘feminism’.

Its opposite is called ‘being assholes’ instead. Choosing which side to be on shouldn’t be complex, should it?

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