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The true power of kink – Interview with Auntie Vice
Auntie Vice, a kink educator I had just a passing familiarity with, had a problem: the guest of her upcoming podcast episode had stood her up. So I did what any respectable cis-het man does and jumped to the rescue – too late, it turns out. Yet we had struck a...
All about endorphins in kink – Interview with Hermes Solenzol
When I am asked why submitting to pain is fun, I usually provide a quick-and-dirty simplification of the so-called “endorphin ecstasy”, or “subspace”. It goes like this: sexual arousal increases the thresholds for pain and stress. When your organism experiences enough...
World Cage – Making chastity safe (and an interview)
You know how these things go. There I was, minding my coaching business, when I received an email that basically said: «Hi! I’m a fan and the greatest expert on chastity devices. I just created the best ever, wanna see it?» Of course I wanted to know more. But, maybe...
The sense of Norway for unusual sexualities
A few days ago I attended the LGBTQ+ Tourism European Estates General, an event with very important implications punctually ignored by the hordes of “activists” who claim to be oh so committed to the advancement of equality rights. Too bad for them, because they would...
Stop posturing as an alpha male
Those of you who follow my site will have noticed how I frequently return to the observation that even the world of unusual eros is subject to fads and trends - and how these often appear more evident in the BDSM scene, which is inherently characterized by taking...
Are you BDSM enough?
We all have our ups and downs. I, for one, recently received an email from someone who rediscovered me last week after following me back when I was still writing extreme erotic stories (I stopped about 25 years ago). «I've seen your videos,» she wrote among other...
The changing education to kink
The less public and yet maybe more important part of my job consists in lecturing at two specialization courses in sexology and one in criminology. The students are mental health professionals, doctors, jurists and police wishing to correctly understand and manage...
Apocalyptic fetishisms and bellyhappy mommies
A – smaller than you think – part of my job as an atypical sexualities scholar consists of analyzing the developments in pornography. Porn does provably and clearly reflects the zeitgeist: the Seventies of the century past were characterized by pseudo-intellectual and...
A tale of pasta and rice
I ended up in a queue with L’Omino, who among his many artistic endeavors also wrote a book called Tinder’s List, about his dating misadventures. While talking, I recalled a very brief chapter I really loved – and that he graciously authorized me to translate and...
Unusual sex dangers: a survival manual
Once upon a time, about forty years ago, there was the Great Mystery of Alternative Sexualities. Most of the world was still coming to terms with revolutionary concepts such as the contraceptive pill, feminism, open homosexuality, divorce or gender transition. If on...
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