One book about submission has set the passion of Spaniards aflame – and it is not another BDSM trilogy. Maybe. And to be precise, it is not a Spanish book either.
Cásate y sé sumisa by Costanza Miriano, a television journalist specializing in women’s issues, began life in 2011 as a vanity print in Italy as Sposati e sii sottomessa – Lettera a una generazione in crisi (literally: ‘Marry and submit to him – A letter to a generation in the doldrums’). Its “revolutionary” message was simple: stop trying to emancipate, quit fighting for equal rights and follow Saint Paul’s teaching when he wrote that women ought to submit to their men. Your life will be easier, the author said, and you will have more time to keep pretty, happy and go shopping.
The book was controversial enough to be picked up by a larger publisher two years later. The subtitle changed to Pratica estrema per donne senza paura (‘An extreme practice for fearless women’) and it was promptly forgotten.
The Spanish translation was published to a much stronger publisher, the printing arm of the Archbishop of Granada. The Church has such a powerful hold on all sorts of media that the book “mysteriously” popped up into the limelight – but this attention immediately backfired. The few secular media, laical politicians and non-Neanderthalian people in general were outraged by the message.
In a country where domestic violence is rampant and sometimes lethal, the public outcry was strong enough to bring the book and the publisher to court. While the Spanish parliament has launched two official enquiries about its legality, a Granada-based women’s committee is petitioning no less than the Constitutional High Court to condemn the work for breaking all the rules about equality, violence prevention and human rights.
To this date the archbishop didn’t make any statement – possibly because he famously shot himself in the foot already in the past when he said that «Of course if a woman has an abortion, the males, the masters, have the absolute right to rape her». The author dismisses the accusations with a laugh instead: «You can think what you want, but no word in my book instigates to violence. I chose not to buy 50 shades of Grey, but those practices are much more demeaning». In all honesty, it must be said that Miriano also wrote another (unsuccessful) companion book titled Marry her and die for her – Real men for fearless women, but her obsession for considering marriage a sort of divinely inspired, dangerous and extreme sport at best is somewhat worrying.
This mystifying vision is however more common than you think, and sometimes even more sinister. Thriving bunches such as Taken in hand and Christian domestic discipline don’t even try to conceal their excitement about «putting women into their place» to the tune of spankings, beltings, whippings and good old beatings. All in the name of the Christians’ god will, of course – and the ugliest part is how they don’t even have to sweat to pick the Bible verses to support their “lifestyle”.
Using scriptures to abuse the innocent and weak is, of course, the oldest of pastimes for cowardly scum of all confessions. This notwithstanding, leveraging religious superstitions to indulge in sadomasochism is plainly criminal. Try googling ‘Christian BDSM’ and you will be amazed by the byzantine loops way too much people are willing to jump through to delude themselves their kink is somehow sanctioned by an invisible man in the sky.
This wouldn’t be a problem at all if it really was BDSM we were talking about. After all,consenting, informed adults are very welcome to enjoy themselves whatever way they please. Fact is, operations like Miriano’s book and the saintly perverts mentioned above hide behind the trappings of religion exactly to take advantage of vulnerable persons and force them to accept abuses they would never consent to otherwise – and since “religion” cannot be questioned, they feel untouchable. Until they dare too much. Maybe this embarrassing fiasco will prove to be just what it was needed to finally bring the disgrace into the public discourse.