I guess we should have seen it coming. Remember how four years ago the hipster crowd raved about that “literary reimagining” called Pride, prejudice and zombies? That book spawned a whole series of stories injecting popular tropes into stuffy (and copyright-free) classic literature, including the very Abraham Lincoln: vampire hunter currently shown in movie theatres worldwide. Then we have the global best seller 50 shades of Grey, which was originally conceived as a BDSM fanfiction with Twilightcharacters.

Now put these two hits in a blender, mix them thoroughly, and you’ll obtain… the Clandestine Classics series – which is to say a slew of perverted rewrites of important titles like 20.000 leagues under the sea or Jane Eyre. If you ever wondered which sadistic games did Sherlock Holmes inflict on poor dr. Watson in their free time, or exactly how much submissive could Elizabeth Bennet (of Pride and prejucice fame) get with Darcy, these female-authored ebooks will give you all the answers. In detail. In lurid, throbbing, sweaty detail. Now we only have to hope that nobody notices how popular Disney movies are, or the consequences might be devastating…